Next Stop...65th St.
Like most New Yorkers, I walked and biked quite a bit over the past 3 days. Who needs Jenny Craig when you've got the MTA? I was wondering how much weight we've lost collectively as a city. Well I think I got my answer tonight. I was thinking about a pound a day. Then I watched the news and a man on the street said he lost 5 pounds in the last 2 days. So let's say the average is 4 lbs per person times 7 million commuters. That would be 28 million pounds shed on the streets of New York since Tuesday. Astounding!
Tonight I walked from 45th and 9th up to 108th and Broadway. Not too bad. It took me 2.5 hours because I made 6 stops and some phone calls. Where else could walking be so productive? First I did some Christmas shopping at Tower records, then I hit a street vendor. I hit him after I bought the Pashmina shawl. Pashmina, smashmina. I shouldn't be punishing someone else for my bad purchases.
Next stop...Starbucks. I was going to need something hot besides my ass to get me home. The nice gentleman behind the counter asked me, "How's your holiday season going so far?"
"Shut up", I said.
"What can I get for you today?"
"Can I have a tall hot chocolate please?"
"What's the first name on that?", he asked.
How efficient, I thought. Will Starbucks ever stop impressing me?
"Can I give you my last name instead?", I said.
"Sure."
A minute or so later I heard, "Tall hot chocolate for Mrs. Clause!"
"Thank you", I said, with a wink and a wrinkle of my nose.
Three dollars and one block later the hot chocolate was consumed and I was having abandonment issues. I still had 40 some odd blocks to go! And no more hot companion in my gloved hand. Well, a few stupid gifts and a cheeseburger later I finally found myself at home. By stupid gift, I mean I bought a small plastic lobster that will grow 600% bigger when I put him in a 2 liter bottle of cold water for 72 hours. I'm looking forward to doing a science experiment before I wrap it because I have that kind of time on my hands. The guy told me I have to lie the bottle down so it grows the length of the bottle and not the width. That was super helpful as well as hilarious. I can't wait to see the look on my sister's face when she opens it.
Joy To The World and Happy Holidays!
Tonight I walked from 45th and 9th up to 108th and Broadway. Not too bad. It took me 2.5 hours because I made 6 stops and some phone calls. Where else could walking be so productive? First I did some Christmas shopping at Tower records, then I hit a street vendor. I hit him after I bought the Pashmina shawl. Pashmina, smashmina. I shouldn't be punishing someone else for my bad purchases.
Next stop...Starbucks. I was going to need something hot besides my ass to get me home. The nice gentleman behind the counter asked me, "How's your holiday season going so far?"
"Shut up", I said.
"What can I get for you today?"
"Can I have a tall hot chocolate please?"
"What's the first name on that?", he asked.
How efficient, I thought. Will Starbucks ever stop impressing me?
"Can I give you my last name instead?", I said.
"Sure."
A minute or so later I heard, "Tall hot chocolate for Mrs. Clause!"
"Thank you", I said, with a wink and a wrinkle of my nose.
Three dollars and one block later the hot chocolate was consumed and I was having abandonment issues. I still had 40 some odd blocks to go! And no more hot companion in my gloved hand. Well, a few stupid gifts and a cheeseburger later I finally found myself at home. By stupid gift, I mean I bought a small plastic lobster that will grow 600% bigger when I put him in a 2 liter bottle of cold water for 72 hours. I'm looking forward to doing a science experiment before I wrap it because I have that kind of time on my hands. The guy told me I have to lie the bottle down so it grows the length of the bottle and not the width. That was super helpful as well as hilarious. I can't wait to see the look on my sister's face when she opens it.
Joy To The World and Happy Holidays!
3 Comments:
"I was going to need something hot besides my ass to get me home."
Sadly there are no photos of your hot ass on this website. Please update it.
I just happen to have some pictures that you might want to see. Give me the weekend, and I will scan them in. Debbie looks good in POLYESTER. The pictures are from "back in the day".
"Back in the day" or recent images; it doesn't matter. I can't get enough Debbie Shea.
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